Tuesday, June 5, 2012

9 months

Hi there sweet boy!  Today marks the 9 mos anniversary of your death.  I miss you so much my baby boy!  The days seem to drag but then again time has flown by.  I was still awake at 4:00am and thought about how I was helping you to the Bridge at that time 9 months ago.  I still cry every day for you.  There have been a  few days that I made it without crying.  I was very surprised.  You are on my mind 24/7.  Yesterday I happened to look up the 2005 calender online because I wanted to see what the date was for Labor Day that year.  That is the day you came to live with us.  It happened to be Sept. 5th, 2005.  You passed away on Sept. 5th, 2011, Labor Day.  How weird is that?  I wish I could hold you and hug you.  I want to feel your soft fur under my hands.  I even miss your bark.  I thought I heard you whining last night.  Were you here?  Do you come here to comfort me?  I hope you do.  I have to be honest though.  I don't feel you here.  I want to so much.  I look at your urn and can't imagine you being in there.  I know it is just your ashes and you really aren't there.  You are all around me.  Every where I look I see you here.  Your toys....your stuffed lion.  I still imagine you laying on the floor by my feet.  I miss you so much!  I will NEVER stop missing you!

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